Deep fried fish fillet and bread calamari.  Served with french fries, cocktail sauce, tartar sauce, and a lemon wedge.  $14.50
The Ramp, San Francisco

This may look like a great plate of food, but it was the greasiest pile of crap I’ve ever had.  The oil they used to fry this in had to have been super cold because the fish fillet (especially) and everything else was saturated and dripping with grease.  I tried dabbing (then pressing and pummeling) napkins on it to try to soak up the grease, but all the napkins on the table were quickly used up and I was left with a sad, flaccid still-greasy pile of food in front of me.  They could’ve served me a cold sponge saturated in grease, and I wouldn’t know the difference.  Sad…